I should be looking forward to this but, honestly I can't seem to catch that wave. I hated 79 of the 80 minutes when we beat Saints in the semi. Against Hull we always seemed to be just out of the race so that never really came to the boil for me. The mpg was tortuous and not what I'd describe as enjoyment until the hooter went.
I really want to enjoy everything about the day and relish the atmosphere and occasion, but...the emotional investment I have in this club makes every crushed dream a little bit too raw to cope with. When I know I can't fully enjoy a day like today for what it is, it sometimes makes me doubt whether there is any merit in me following the sport at all.
Kipling talked about meeting with triumph and disaster, and treating both those imposters just the same - I'm fine with the triumph bit, trouble is age has no left me no better at coping with the disaster stuff. Presumably that means I fail the definition of being a man, my son. Oh well...
So, Good luck today to all connected with this up-lifting, soul destroying, dream crushing but ultimately inspirational movement of ours. You have made me proud this season. You are my City, my Club and my team and even though I hate you often, please know I love you dearly.
